An Explanation:
Weasel McPuppy is a real dog, and the posts below are real letters sent from her to celebrities via snail mail. A self-addressed stamped envelope was included with each letter to encourage a reply. If and when Weasel receives a response, the post will be updated with the full correspondence.
Dear Mr. Hefner,
You should find a nice girl your own age and settle down. I hear Betty White is available.
Your friend,
Weasel McPuppy
P.S. - I also like to chase bunnies.
P.P.S. - Please send me your picture. I've enclosed my picture. My photo is for your eyes only. I better not see it printed in your magazine.
Dear Mr. Neuman,
You don't appear to have aged a day since 1956. What is the secret of your youthful appearance? Do you bathe in the blood of virgins; or do you have a painting locked in a room that is aging in your place?
Just wondering,
Weasel McPuppy
P.S. - How many more must suffer due to your incessant lust for youth and fame?
P.P.S. - I am adorable without having struck an unholy bargain with the forces of darkness. I've enclosed my picture. Please send me your picture.
Dear Stephanie,
Why are you always making jokes about beavers? I don't get it. I can't think of anything less funny than a beaver. I've tried foolin' around with some, and believe me, beavers are all business. Have you ever managed to amuse a beaver?
Your friend,
Weasel McPuppy
P.S. - While I don't think beavers are very funny, I have to admit that some of them smell kinda funny. Ha, ha.
P.P.S. - You are more delightful than any beaver I've ever encountered. Please send me your picture. I've enclosed my picture.
Dear Mr. McHale,
I'm glad you changed the name of your show from
Talk Soup to
The Soup, 'cause I'm pretty sure that talk soup would taste like spittle. What does your soup taste like?
Your friend,
Weasel McPuppy
P.S. - If you made your soup out of peanut butter, bananas, and French fries, you would make this doggy very happy.
P.P.S. - I've enclosed my picture. Please send me your picture and maybe some peanut butter, banana, and French fry soup.
Today I received a response from the Amazing Kreskin. I wonder if he opened my letter or if he divined the contents with the power of his mind.
To read my letter to Mr. Kreskin and to see his response, click here-->
Link
Yesterday I received a response from Fonzie! It was cool. How could it not be?
To read my original letter to Mr. Winkler and to see his response, click here-->
Link
Dear Mr. Kreskin,
I've heard you say that you don't employ stooges or confederates. What about headliners or Yankees?
Just wondering,
Weasel McPuppy
P.S. - I'm not sure your hiring practices are strictly legal.
P.P.S. - I've enclosed my picture. Please send me your picture. I'm surprised I haven't already received it, because I'm sure you foresaw this letter.
The Reply:
To Weasel McPuppy,
Whom I'd love to meet,
ESPecially,
Kreskin
A Note From Weasel Regarding The Reply:Mr. Kreskin,
Your response made this doggy very happy. But why am I telling you that? You probably already used your creepy brain powers to read my mind.
